Red-Breasted Robin

We've been decidedly MIA, for which I apologize, but there is good reason. My beloved is of course still working her two jobs, and I am now one month and one day away from finally graduating. Providing, of course, that I don't screw it up. There are no guarantees in baseball.

There's a lot to talk about, from the new job, to my sudden lack of medication, including, of course, our new President; however, as The United States of Tara is starting imminently, I can leave you with a small anecdote.

This afternoon, Barbara's boss from the real job (not CoffeeLand) took all of his employees, and their partners, out to a very swish (in the English sense of the word) luncheon. At this luncheon, we met the girlfriend of the youngest son of said boss. Does it say something about my character if the form of that sentence makes me think in German's dative case?

Anyway, we shall call the girlfriend Red-Breasted Robin, and she...was a trip. A complete and utter riot, to the point where I was emailing myself comments, lest I forget. 24, native to New Jersey, and I believe one of a kind. It is with a slight warning that I introduce you to a very scary mind.

Red-Breasted Robin: Oh my god, J's cousin's boyfriend, I think he's gay. He's like the best dancer ever, and he's not even Italian or Black.

Stay tuned for your next installment, coming soon.

Karmic Retribution

I'm very aware that those two terms should not really belong in the same sentence together, but I appear to be having one of those mornings. This morning, I hit snooze maybe 4 times (it gives you an extra 9 minutes each time) and then the plummet began.

I hadn't really given myself enough time to get ready this morning, so I just went into autopilot. I grabbed some cereal and left the house around 8am, needing to be at school 25 minutes later, at a location 35 minutes away. The car wouldn't start. Nothing major, he was just cold. So I eventually got him started, and then he needed time to warm up. So I ran inside and grabbed myself an apple for lunch. Then we were on our way.

10 minutes into my journey I am suddenly aware that I have left my wallet and cell phone at home. Foregoing the soda this morning because "I'll just stop for coffee" became one of the worst ideas I've had. It's too late to turn around, so I figure I'm just going to have to force myself through the day on my apple, and the soda I left in the work refrigerator yesterday.

I arrive at school, 8:25 on the dot, grab my bag from the passenger seat and watch helplessly as my apple flies out of my bag, under the SUV I parked next to. At this point all I can do is laugh. I come inside, run to the employee lounge to grab my soda, and it's gone. Some minx must've taken off with it. I can't blame them, really; it was a nummy vanilla type soda. But it was mine.

I have no food, no wallet, no phone, no money...and I'm thinking about just going home! No more snooze for me.